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I am Single Because…

The man who is according to my very long and detailed fantasy list suppose to be cuddling with me at night went down the isle whilst I was busy grieving after being cheated on by a man who was not only all kinds of pathetic but still maintains his highly regarded occupation of being a skillful and discreet serial womaniser.

Another thing is the man who’s meant to be with me is sceptical about the whole of me. He has professionally friend-zoned me by insisting that the five year gap between us makes him too old to have anything intimate to do with me. He keeps referring to an ex of mine everytime things start to get cosy and an inch too magical between us. He asks irrelevant questions like how many guys I’ve gone down with, as if undermining or maybe weighing my womanhood and my ability to receive and give love.

I’m also single because the not so gentle man who wants to be with me is undoubtedly not my type. Type in this particular case implies his very dry and sexually centred sense of humour that gives me cringes and annoyance in equal measure. His dominating demeanour leaves me listening to stories of his success and achievements hundred percent of the time when the only thing I need is to be held and caressed in calming silent. He is undoubtedly not my type because a conversation only makes sense to him if after his acclaimed capabilities to explore the female body (body being an undertone in this instance) ends in nakedness and an orgasm.

In all honesty, I’m single because giving and receiving love has been reduced to dirty talk, nude pics and shagging the living life out of each other’s physicality. In all of this, the heart is sidelined, its attention desired but its whole affection unattended to. Getting a sex partner seems more important than getting to know a person. And here I stand, single because all I really want are little things that grow a person in remarkable ways. Like a pair of ears, that will have interest on the occurrences of my journey and shed light unto my challenges. A mouth and a tongue that will not just be happy to lock with my lips and tongue. But lips and tongue that will create words that will mould not only me but that which we’re trying to build.

So yes I know, I’m single because amongst many other things, I’m asking for far too much from a world of individuals who pride themselves about giving zero fucks and I’m very aware that this can’t be the world I signed up to. I’m unable to adapt and I could very well be slowly dying. Perhaps they are right, I should just get a highly educated psychologist and a good motivational read because times have changed and no one saw it fit to email me the newsletter.

Father’s Day and South Africa

Children are angry, women are heartbroken and fathers are still on the run. This is the grievous reality of many South Africans. Nevertheless, it does not take away from the order of the day.

Its Father’s day in South Africa today, so a very happy and blessed father’s day to all fathers even those outside South Africa.

South Africa is going through change and many will wonder why things have changed for the worst but the answer will not be of public knowledge but rather an introspection for every citizen to look at what their role has been.

One thing I know for a fact is that a sour attitude towards each other and continuous acts of encroachment is what will always stand against our unity and fruition.

#endfathersday

#endfathersday trends

Be it a hoax or the truth for some, I still don’t get why wrath of this magnitude can have an effect so great it tops our ‘trends map’ a day before father’s day. Maybe I’ve drastically failed to understand the pain but I do however feel the rage and I’ve also seen the harm it can do.

Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame, Benjamin Franklin once said.

And the question I’m asking is, how long will we allow wrath and anguish to shame our future?

Allow me to be completely honest; if this was two years ago, I would have seen nothing wrong with the hashtag and the reason for this post would have been unnecessary because then, my father was according to my perception nothing worthy of honour, appreciation or celebration.

He was just a man who met my beloved mother and decided to give her a baby while he went on with his daily adventures and pretending to like the idea of my existence. Before my eyes, the only person he gave special attention to was none but himself.

However, this is a new year and this year is a special year. I want to for the first time with honour, compassion and appreciation wish my father a blissful and blessed father’s day filled with lots of food, jokes and maskandi music – some of the things my father would rather be caught dead than live without besides his family of course.

Daddy…
With wishing you a grand father’s day, I also want to tell you that I’ve forgiven all those years you spent working instead of being with me; reading me a bedtime story, teaching me how to escape washing the dishes, defending me against mom’s scoulding or maybe telling me my awfully crayon coloured drawings are pretty.

Today is about you and your role in my life which you took upon even though you were not 100 percent ready but took part and did what you could. I will not crucify you for things you were not able to do but I will always remember the things you managed to do.

Happy father’s day daddy dearest and I really do think you’re a great dad and an exceptional father even though there is room for improvement like there is room for me to be a better daughter.

🙂
DevynStella

Men are Beautiful – An Appreciation of Majestic Creatures

A man is a supernatural crafted creation whose purpose is to conquest a clandestine doctrine that is to disclose itself through daily sufferings. He is a God given machine which in its capabilities lies astounding augustly worth. A man is a creation brought forth to represent the importance and existence of the celestial God on the planet.

The hurt carried by women, would disagree, however this is not a matter of debate, rather a declaration; men are beautiful. And their roots spring from greater envisions.

Usually in my country, men get very little if any good publicity. This animadversion has incredible deteriorated men value. The exact side-lining of men makes us forget the creed God purposefully created men for.

So permit me to tell you about the exorbitant artistry of men. I grant you the permission to indulge on this heavenly creation through its physical features, which hail from the well kept head to the fittingly maintained physique, down the brawny outer calf muscles.

I prefer to look into this exquisite creation through the base of its modeling; making a slow zoom into his perfectly distilled constituents. Like the projection of his preferred articulation, the refined eloquentness of his words. The delicate quality in choosing conversations worthy of his eminent value. The amour-propre he has for who he is. The dignity which reflects in the way he walks. The enamor that blossoms through his creativity. The delight which resounds through his voice. His cultivating hand that is ever so willing to extend for the curing of his nation. This kind of man is not a dime in the dozen rather a one in a million.

I’m talking about a man whose imperfections grant him the capacity to acknowledge his misfortunes and mistakes. He possesses a vocabulary ability inclusive of sentences such as; “thank you”, “I’m sorry”, “I made a mistake”, “I appreciate you” and of course “I love you”.

To my advantage, I’ve been fortunate to realise that men are the astrally God created beings which with love are to secure our ambiance and nurture our beautifullness. More importantly, I’ve grasped the knowledge; God deemed men the head for they are meant to love, secure, lead and protect.

Dear men, as I take this seat, I do none but adore your eyes which tell stories of envisions that our generations will find everlasting joy in. It gives me a purpose to strengthen, through a smile, your bones which have with time grown weary.

Lying helplessly in your arms, introduces to me a heart which is pounding with blood that through its predurelence many smiles will glow with happiness. Your heart beats in correlation with mine as assurance that the next day needs our unison presence and passion.

I sleep at night with you in mind, and you lie awake in the midnight hour as solutions for our decaying world knock into your mind for recognition.

You are a God given nature to oversee the unforeseen misfortunes of our daily struggles. Struggles which nourish the muscles we (women) tenderly fall for. These struggles are witnessed in your hands which have held and shed heavy loads of pain.

In you I delegate the duty to love, respect, honor and appreciate. In your arms I find hope and strength to sees the dreams that despair almost deprived me off.

Great is the love you will pass down to our offsprings which I imagine will look into you with love and lie in your arms hopelessly knowing that you are their shield.

If mountains, rivers and sands could give thanks, they would chant songs of appreciation to you for you have helped bring unto their presence purpose for their creation; you have given them the duty to flourish for our well-being.

It is without a doubt that your presence is my present.

Men, you are beautiful, not for your features, although they cannot be missed, you are beautiful for you have known the powerful yet secretive strength that my Lord invested in you.

You are a leader, not by choice, but through respecting the basis of your artfulness. Honoring the purpose the sovereign God saw in you as he perfectly molded you with his blessing hands.

The power that a forlorn, desponded nation needs is the strength in you which can drive through impossibilities like they never existed.

Today I thank you for you are a vessel of honor, a man worthy of love and deserving of respect.

I promise to speak to the Almighty on my knees every night asking him to restore perseverance and store hope in you. I will ask him to give an extra day every day, for you are deserving of a long life.

Men, whatever happens, never forget that you are beautiful.

With Love
DevynStella

I Found Revolution in Tembisa

It started when I watched the television, eyes wide open, everything took a slow motion to the pause mode and my jaw was left gaping. Goose bumps filled my skin and shrills went down my spine. This was the classical condition of one in awe.

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Tembisa Revolution doing what they do best

My body switched to the self-regulating state and I could do nothing but obey. I was literally like a vehicle and the gear changed from awe to speechless. Words could not leave my voice box even though I had many of them.

‘Ha’ finally came out. I was surprised, taken by talent to cloud nine, I really felt the presence of stars in my eyes and the smell of yellow roses in my nose. I was unknowingly smiling like a Cheshire cat to my television screen.

Tembisa Revolution showing you how Kasi pansula is done

Tembisa Revolution showing you how Kasi pansula is done

This was a revolution, and to my surprise, it was televised. I had not enough money, but I wanted to invest, to adeptness that my country has been craving for. I wanted these guys to transform other hearts better than they did mine. I wanted to grant them the aptitude to evoke love in everyone they met, for they could do it.

They were from Tembisa and revolution was their game. I’m not one for dancers or dance crews, however these guys changed my whole perspective. They evoked, nurtured and grew the love for authentic, raw South African talent in me.

I wanted the world to witness their phenomenal capabilities. The things they could do with their bodies. The love and passion they had for dancing. I respected them, for they had found their dominion and they did more than just dominate it, rather they serviced it with embrace and honor.

When I watched them, I somehow felt the need to repeat Thabo Mbeki’s words with more than just pride but with dignity instilled as well. So I stood, fist resting in my heart and my left hand portraying the Amandla sign and I said it with pride and dignity; I Am An African.

Tembisa Revolution jumping for joy moments after being named South Africa's best dance crew

Tembisa Revolution jumping for joy moments after being named South Africa’s best dance crew

This was Tembisa Revolution, a South African dance crew that brought love for the talent concealed (yet to be discovered) in this country come alive in my heart.  Young men of their age are unlikely to evoke such enamor to one’s heart in this country. And for that reason, I desired, even though they didn’t know me, growth and fruition in their future. I love their work; I wish nothing but the best for them.

Love, Hate and Justin Bieber

the Bieber is interviewed - bieberism movement.

the Bieber is interviewed – bieberism movement.

Justin, preparing to drive the beliebers wild - as he is prone to

Justin, preparing to drive the beliebers wild – as he is prone to

‘It’s either you LOVE me or you HATE me’ it is an undeniable truth that the 19 year old Justin Bieber has experienced both sides of this phrase. There is an ‘I hate Justin Bieber club’ on Facebook for the dedicated haters of Justin, those if given the change, would shred Mr Bieber into thin pieces of nothing, whilst there is a Tumblr blog: ‘I am a Belieber’ for the die-hard Bieber fever infected Justin Bieber fans.

I do not know the hold Mr Bieber has on people for its either they LOVE him insanely or they would rather have him buried alive. I’m not a fan of his music (something that could unite us) and I therefore don’t care much if he’s coming or going. I must say though, I’ve been looking at his pictures (like everyone else, and he sure is blessed with looks) simply because he seems to be a subject of interest for journalists and their headlines, one thing Mr Bieber does is remind me of that gentleman whose ‘stuck in the mirror’ with a suit and a tie – Justin Timberlake [the 20/20 experience is something to be experienced].

Justin Bieber looking for approval from the Biebs

Justin Bieber looking for approval from the Biebs

‘Jealousy makes you nasty’, that is partially true for jealousy does not only make you nasty, it also deems you a murderer of people that don’t even know you; since jealousy’s capability can stem all measures of evil.

Maybe he’s a jerk and maybe even a brat too but when I actually got to see for myself the amount of hate mail Bieber must be receiving every day, I started to wonder how reliable and secure his security and body guard system is. I mean no child of the universe should be receiving such ‘criticism’ from individuals who obviously did not study the philosophy of criticism (if such a course is offered) for they engage in nothing but degradation.

You hate somebody for what they’ve taken away from you, I wouldn’t know why Bieber is hated by those he has never met. Then again, I guess not everybody will like you even if you’ve done absolutely nothing to them. And in this case not everybody is infected with the Bieber fever.

Justin looking as innocent as a new born

Justin looking as innocent as a new born

It is a defamatory artwork that our hatred journeys to altitudes that our thoughts can only dream of. I always have little to say when matters of distaste towards people are on the table, unless of course I am really not excited about your existence and your previous appalling deeds and or you have stepped in my territory with your mighty ruthless gait that then propels me to throw in a sentence or two.

Bieber with his fashion statement on his birthday - shirtless!

Bieber with his fashion statement on his birthday – shirtless!

Maybe Mr Bieber has also stirred up repugnance from the people who have nothing but abomination to express towards him, and to a certain extent you wouldn’t blame them. How do you tolerate a teenager who has banked more than the money you’ve seen with your naked eye? How do you live in peace with a teenager who can literally buy you and your every bit?

Emotionally attached Bieber

Emotionally attached Bieber

You’re not one of the wealthiest teenagers in the universe nor the most watched by paparazzi youngster, so maybe you can just be a little envious. The idea of you in possession of Justin’s wealth will lighten not only your worries, but it will add a few necessary required zero’s on your bank balance, and we both know how a smile and generosity is automatically yielded by those extra naughts. Otherwise Bieber wouldn’t be worthy of being a subject of disinterest in your sometimes unspoken conversations which occur when you come across his name, which at the peak of the man’s career, it’s likely to be every split second.

It is an undeniable sad truth; we walk with abhorrence on our shoulders, we house disgust in our hearts and our thoughts constantly yield death for one other. All this hate on Justin Bieber is a revelation to me that if you have what people desire, they will ultimately hate you and wish death upon you, thinking that if you die, what was yours will automatically land in their hands.

It has finally been revealed unto me; sometimes people want you to dwell in the midst of daunting, sane confiscating void so as to share and experience the same wrath as them. They are like vessels, except instead of emptiness, there is anguish and revulsion however they still make the loudest of noise.

Justin taking the beliebers to a trance

Justin taking the beliebers to a trance

The beliebers, the biebs those infected with the Bieber fever and drowning in bieberism (anything having to do with Justin Bieber), now these people will stand with Justin Bieber through hate tweets, backlashes about the sometimes not appropriate teenage behavior of the Bieber himself. Before you tweet anything about Justin Bieber make sure it is only good for you shall encounter a swarm of biebs in the defense of the Bieber if you choose otherwise.

Justin on a cover of a magazine I wouldn’t mind being on myself

 

 

I can bet you 10cents, you were not on the list of the 53th Grammy nominees, nor did FORBES magazine name you the third most POWERFUL celebrity in the WORLD. One thing that sets you apart from the ‘all around the world’ heat singer is little things, like you not having self-acclaimed critiques dissecting your every move, even if it just an innocent sneeze in public, so face it, even though it’s a hard pill of honesty to swallow, Justin Bieber is a BIG deal. Whether you love him or wish he was your son, truth be told, he is not going nowhere. If you have found association with his music, good for you. If however, you don’t find him worthy of being a subject of interest to anyone then I suggest you keep that to yourself and focus on the things you could do right in your life, for bieberism hasn’t gotten the better of you.

Justin Bieber I wish you all the best as you try to ignore the haters by embracing the love that the biebs are giving to you. You have embarked on a tough journey and I hope you have the strength to endure and sustain yourself.

Let’s Gather OUR Families – A Connectedness Approach

This is a sentiment evoked by a television show I recently watched. They were strategising the construction of practical ideas which can reduce hooliganism in townships. Societal issues always trigger my attention for I have so much to yet invest in my people. I am aware of their strength and power as I have more than once off-loaded my heavy heart unto their hands and danced to the sounds of their joy. Wherever I go, I always know, their struggle is my struggle and their tears are my anguish. So it’s natural that when they are infected, I pay more than the required attention, to analytically gather solutions to sufferings.

Hooliganism would briefly be characterised by many as notoriety. The strategies to defeat this ‘notoriety’ were based on approaching and turning hoodlums into economically viable society individuals. I observed that these solutions were limited to sport recreational activities. I also noted that the methodology applied by grown-ups in phenomenon’s which young individuals combat is not well suited for both parties to understand and execute for favourable outcomes. The gap in both parties lifestyle is to take the blame, parents become overwhelmed by fear that in spite of raising their kids well, history might repeats itself and their beloved kids might find themselves in the same or worse complications that THEY battled with. Parents are always trying to protect their kids from the problems they haven’t yet faced. This in turn becomes an extreme vexation for youngsters as they want their own experiences so as to explore who and what they are.

In my perception, hooliganism is more than just – oversized t-shirts, underpants revealing baggy jeans, overly explicit language, engagement in criminal activities and finding pleasure in music with foul language. These are just some of the effects of the real disorder. The core syndrome as I see it is emotional starvation. These people lack love, attention, affection, appreciation and acknowledgment from the people they hold dear to. When somebody’s well-being is emotionally enfeebled, he/she is in battle with the functionality of the world they occupy. Hence the individual is driven into emotional vulnerability and is prone onto informed decisions in proceeds for emotional breakthrough. Hooliganism in turn serves the purpose to overly apprehend this vulnerability and estrangement; it provides a safe-house for the emotionally vulnerable.

Teenagers have a complex way of gathering thoughts and understanding ideas. They operate in a completely different realm to that of their parents. They might grow in a similar environment and experience almost the same situations but their reception and reaction to the encounter will be different to that of their parents. We must understand that we are not coded to react to problems similarly. This encounter has proven to be challenging for parents when it comes to helping their kids deal with problems. They are unable to reach a bridge of flawless communication and understanding. Parents do not always consider that kids have different needs the same way as people. People are different, kids are also people and that makes them different too, therefore, it is out of prudent to treat and raise your kids in a similar fashion, probably one of them needs more attention that the other.

I’ve read a few factual books on serial killers and found a common link between them and hoodlums. Most, if not all serial killers have had a deranged up-bringing; they came from broken families, families that lacked a solid foundation and structure. It is either there was abuse (in all aspects), negligence or otherwise the kid was bullied at school and the parents were so immersed in their own lives to notice. I’ve also found the exact same aspects to carve hooliganism. Usually teenagers will lack a voice at home – no one is willing to listen, care, nurture or make them feel loved, accepted and part of the family. Hence they venture into other activities more togetherness orientated such as hooliganism, where they will feed on their hunger for love, protection but most importantly a voice. They engage in such so as to find the fundamental family connectedness which they lack.

Before the sporting activity ventures to halt hooliganism, I would focus on building the family structure. Families should engage in activities that draw them towards each other, there should be enough hours dedicated to family time so as to increase ties which are meant to connect families. Every member of the family should find comfort, strength, motivation, appreciation and love at home before anywhere else. Everyone’s presence at home should be acknowledged and appreciated. An individual should be comfortable at home to freely express him/herself without fear of judgment and degradation. I believe that if our families are a source of strength, we would not feel the need to seek fulfillment outside the family institution. The number one ingredient in societal problems is family trusses which have dire loop holes. Don’t make home a foul place for your family members, give them love, support, credit where its due, and let them be aware that you’re there for them.

We are human beings and emotions carry us. When we feel that our emotional realm is not satisfied, we engage in acts which the society deems as “attention seeking” whilst it’s just our way of blowing a whistle notifying people that we need emotional support. We live in a world where people are emotionally scared and for that reason we find ourselves in this world of crime, terrorism, drugs and so forth for people are in veagence to heal their wounds and they do this in notoriety (so as to cover the emotional scars of wrath and inferiority) to attract superiority and command.

A Philanthropist’s Dream in an Angry World.

HE WHO ANGERS YOU, CONQUERS YOU. – Elizabeth Kenny

Love and anger – the two feelings which embody what we are, they reveal what is deeply stored within us. These feelings are the main trigger of our actions, the same actions which hold together the POWER to determine our future, the MIGHT to dictate where we lend up. Love and anger – they hold us firmly together or leave us severely divided. We need to choose at all times, an appropriate feeling for the encounter at hand. We cannot deny the effectiveness of the past roaming within our presence- the feelings it arouses. We however need a reformatory for our psychology,to free the mind which is locked behind steel misapprehension bars. We must engage in a battle to free ourselves for the sake of our kids. We have to do away with the noose which till this day serves the vision of the oppressor. This is the same snare which bounded our fore fathers from dominion. For the corrosion we know the trap to cause, we are entitled to journey so to be the last generation to withstand its whiplashes.

THE GREATEST WEAPON IN THE HAND OF THE OPPRESSOR IS THE MIND OF THE OPPRESSED. – Stephen Biko

The command of inferiority which was instilled in our intelligence is still in operation to date. The abase through skin colour is still effective. Now the question is how do we emancipate from the ideas of the past that rendered our fore parents inadequate? How do we claim our fortress, reclaim the dignity our grandparents were robbed of? How do we make this forlorn, angry, anguished, survival of the fittest world, a state of peace? How do we generate an unfettered nation from the anger we have inherited? This world is inappropriate for our kids. We have fallen heroes and heroines, they did their best and we are on a slightly longer voyage to that of Mandela’s freedom walk.

THE FIGHT FOR FREEDOM MUST GO ON UNTIL IT IS WON; UNTIl OUR COUNTRY IS FREE AND IS HAPPY AND IS PEACEFUL AS PART OF THE COMMUNITY OF MAN, WE CANNOT REST. – O.R Tambo.

I like the heroes of ours, they fought, battled and maybe made some informed decisions, nonetheless, they gave a today which is much better than their yesterday. They granted us privileges they never relished. Privileges to extend our reach to an altitude they never traversed. This privilege is an opportunity to expand our magnitude, to explore our civil-hood. Our focus should be more than improving livelihood. Our kids are dependent on our decisions. Every move we make has the capability to manifest as a source of strength to their challenges. We have the power to choose the benefits they delight in. Our decisions are more than our own – their ability like that of our forefathers can cross centuries.

love is oneness

love is oneness


I am not a specialist, but I would jump at the opportunity to prescribe unity to our scattered souls, strength to our fragile physics and love in replacement for the hate we have embraced. I would grand us a mind-set to neutralise and conquest the ideas of the past that corrode and trap our aptitude into reaching the highest of altitudes. I would strive to find the scientific codes which will enable us to see the facts from the lies in-between. We are not inferior, we are not disqualified but it’s the strength of the past forces that limit who we can become. This is not a struggle of our own – it is a cry from our future generations, a plea to annihilate the anger in us. We are conditioned to better the environments for our generations, it is an obligation we are ought to complete, an avenue to diminution the challenges of our kids, it is however improbable with the sordid we comprise.

Some people expert far more than they can bargain, but I want us to be proud, to look into our past and smile for we see the fruition of our battle, we understand the victory we have granted our kids. It would be a miscarriage on our part if our generations undergo worse degrees of gruesome crime, appalling rape statistics, abhorrent acts of terrorism, overwhelming truth of unemployment – these are challenges we are ought to overcome. We shall grow up,look into our past and rejoice knowing that we have secured a future for our kids. The questions that lie in the atmosphere are abundant. I do not have many approaches either, then again,one cannot complete this battle single handedly. If you cannot make matters of your livelihood favour you, let them at least favour your kids for they do not deserve to suffer from the hostility which history revealed in us.

we are ought to save our kids

we are ought to save our kids