Archive | March 2013

A Dream

Dear Mr Always on My Mind.

I have been purely absorbed in dream land lately. You know, from time to time we do wish that things were more easier, less complicated and easily translated. However, sometimes we possess not the ability to directly give what is stored deep in our internal beings to the person that it’s due to.

In line to our inability for certain aspects, we sometimes miss the opportunities that we could have held, cherished and blossomed. This is the kind of truth which brings tears to one’s heart.

Maybe I did have a little fear about how you would respond if I told you the truth. Well sometimes I am just plain human and this entire supernatural gift is washed away and all that’s left is the true physical being which has the ability to be overwhelmed by the fear of the unknown. That is of course not a good cause but I not always have a choice.

Let’s cut this conversation before I fumble any further. Do me a favor; pay less attention to the shaky voice and the unsteady words that it brings to your ears. Forgive the tears, I do not know what they are doing, I guess maybe they could not help themselves. It is also not my fault because even though they are mine, it seems I have no control over them.

You see, this is a difficult dream; it brings tears gushing down my cheeks as I watch your hand sleeps through away from mine. All I need is you and your time, maybe that’s not possible with you so deeply immersed in your own dreams. My dreams are abandoned as I make way for yours, as you are always on my mind. I wish it pleased you think of me too, at least once in a while. I may not have witnessed such a feeling of being so interested in somebody else’s life, previously. I do know one thing; I can no longer contain this feeling all to myself. It is undeniable. I am in love with you. Grant me if not the rest of your life, just a moment with you.

Now that I have said it, pretty please, don’t give me the look of that weird remote man in movies. I don’t like it, because it has no substance. It does not give me anything to hold on too. If you do not reciprocally understand then I candidly comprehend.

That Lady, which you don’t look at THAT way at all.


The Nature of Love

We, human beings are an amazing lot. Our creation is beyond the simplicity of the Bing Bang Theory. I truly believe that the roots of our existence are encompassed in the deepest book of secrets that is still yet not known to our scientists.

I think, due to the fact that we do not know everything about ourselves. We spend the entirety of our lives trying to make sense of who we really are through hypothesises, past and many other aspects of our lives that we think can help us make sense of our selves.

We shall only look into our selves here through the journey of trying to make sense of our feelings. A feeling is that encounter which one person experiences individually whilst the person on the other end can reciprocally experience it through a series of verbs and adjectives (my definition).

We have manifested feelings as part of our lives, we no longer encounter them but they have become our daily experience. We have drawn our attention so close to them for this is how we relate to one another as a people – through feelings.
Only after we have identified the feelings that exist between us, we are able to name the type of relationship that we choose to build with the other person of whom the feelings are experienced towards. Otherwise we choose to be strangers because the feeling is not strong enough.

In my definition, feelings are the exertion that draws us close to one another. Sometimes this force becomes so ardent that our whole body reacts to it. This incident is the most profound of all feelings, according to me. However, we have practised it in torment and because of fear we sometimes see the need to discount its presence – LOVE.

I have observed that as we grow, we are likely to try and understand love in comparison to pain and failed love relationships. This is not how we should go about love. Love should be shared from one human being to the next by extending the exertion as pure as it rose from within; limitless with only room for growth. The feeling of love has been torn by many vultures that the love we now exchange for one another comes badly scribbled in very tiny fonts of terms and conditions. The very same terms and conditions become our own vultures that we unknowingly and constantly feed whereas in return, they deprive us the capacity to experience love at its purest abundance.

The fact that we have met people, who have used the name of love to accomplish their deceitful deeds, is heartache. This aching should not be the reason of permitting the temporary feeling of fear into hindering love because love possesses the capability to rescue us from the agony of the past. Love knows no pain; therefore it does not have the ability to torment anybody. However, we humans dwell in pain because it becomes too difficult for us to let go of encounters that left us deeply scarred. For this reason, experiencing the fullness of love becomes an impossible task as we are forever trying to protect ourselves from the repetitions of the misfortunes of the past, even though we are in the future.

A brick that we trip and fall over when taking the journey to experience the fullness of love is that we have defined the word love to an extent that we miss the indigenous feeling of love, which is beyond word definition. We need to understand that love is something that was engrained in us. We cannot go around looking for it. It lives within us. To copiously experience it externally, we need to allow it to overflow from within and then to the outside world. This is why many will say you need to love yourself first in order to attract love.

Another fault that we fall short of is that we give the fullness exertion of love to a person whose feelings have not matured enough to give us back the same amount of love that we have unconsciously given to them. This results in nothing but complete anguish. The anguish is due as this person lacks the aptitude to share the feeling correspondingly towards you. We then choose to make this a burden by trying in our utmost efforts to persuade the person into understanding the feeling in the same way that we individually experience it. We forget that love needs to be conjoint for it to flow impeccably. Otherwise it yields the greatest of torments.

Love is a force that never dies. The disorder in our lives embeds it with darkness. We miss love and the delight it was created to bring in our lives because we are too busy trying to find meaning for everything. If you can, may you just please free yourself from the boundaries of the society’s definition of love. Let love do to you what it’s meant to do to you, nourish you. Nonetheless, even if you attempt to disregard it, bear in mind that love is a power that was preordained to never go unnoticed. The power of love has the forte to creep upon you when you least expect it, for the reason that it resides in the exact same places that we go for to seek refuge.